My neighbor gave me an article from the Boston Globe about being alone.
(You can see it here, if you are interested.)
I frequently think about being alone for a good block of time.
I think many people do who are living with a loved one who is disabled.
These days, I crave being by myself,
perhaps because it is such a rare thing--especially in the winter in Maine.
Used to be that I would avoid being alone whenever possible.
An extrovert by nature, I'd seek out other people for fun and stimulation.
The Globe article, by Leon Neyfakh, points out how our
culture views being alone as suspect, in a way.
Maybe the one who wants to be alone is depressed, has a social phobia,
is deranged or broken in some way.
Yet I find my alone times are rich with inner experiences that heal and sustain me.
Eric Klinenberg, a sociologist at New York University,
put it this way in the article:
"There is something very liberating for people about being on their own. They're able to establish some control over the way they spend their time. They're able to decompress at the end of a busy day in a city...and experience a feeling of freedom."
The challenge is to find that kind of time while being a
companion, fixer, driver, problem solver, finder,
memory and medical/financial associate
of the man I love.
Does anyone else out there struggle with this?
What do you do when you are alone that heals you?
And how do you make sure you take the time?
Gorgeous image!
ReplyDeleteI LOVE having some "alone" time every now and then. What I do? -- normally grab the camera and go outside - and breathe deeply of nature.
I'm with Kerri - spending time outdoors (my dogs are companions) and breathing in nature and watching wildlife... Camera in hand too.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you!
Mike, my alone time is important to me too! I've always been a bit of a loner and probably don't get to be one as much anymore.
ReplyDeleteBut then again, I'm not really alone because I have my camera and she recharges my batteries! Shows me wondrous things and frustrates the heck out of me sometimes!
My late Mother--who loved her alone time--once said to me, if you don't like being alone, you really don't like yourself. I live with my boyfriend, but I love my alone time and always have.
ReplyDeleteWOW! You really got me thinking about alone time. For a couple of years, not long ago, my retired hubby stayed at our sons home about 5 hour drive from our home now, he worked as a handy-man for everyone we once were neighbors with until our move 8 years ago, just to help make our ends meet, I was virtually alone for long periods of time, although we spoke every day, I was alone, I read a lot of books, watched sappy love movies stayed up WAY TO LONG becasue I hated the thought of closing my eyes at night without him at my side. I wasn't very productive. I hated it as a matter of fact...I am not a good alone person I have decided. I guess when you are married over 40 years you are very dependant on your "other half". I am happy to say....it has been a year since my alone time...and I don't look forward to it anytime in the future. I can see know what my mother talked about after my father passed away.
ReplyDeleteThanks, everyone, for your comments and reflections. I should have known that you folks with cameras would have experience with the joys of solitude. Linda, I know what you mean about missing the person you have been with for over 40 years, when he is gone. We have been married for almost 42.
ReplyDelete