My neighbor gave me an article from the Boston Globe about being alone.
(You can see it here, if you are interested.)
I frequently think about being alone for a good block of time.
I think many people do who are living with a loved one who is disabled.
These days, I crave being by myself,
perhaps because it is such a rare thing--especially in the winter in Maine.
Used to be that I would avoid being alone whenever possible.
An extrovert by nature, I'd seek out other people for fun and stimulation.
The Globe article, by Leon Neyfakh, points out how our
culture views being alone as suspect, in a way.
Maybe the one who wants to be alone is depressed, has a social phobia,
is deranged or broken in some way.
Yet I find my alone times are rich with inner experiences that heal and sustain me.
Eric Klinenberg, a sociologist at New York University,
put it this way in the article:
"There is something very liberating for people about being on their own. They're able to establish some control over the way they spend their time. They're able to decompress at the end of a busy day in a city...and experience a feeling of freedom."
The challenge is to find that kind of time while being a
companion, fixer, driver, problem solver, finder,
memory and medical/financial associate
of the man I love.
Does anyone else out there struggle with this?
What do you do when you are alone that heals you?
And how do you make sure you take the time?